I’ve not seen the movie. Yet. The one that makes moms laugh. The one that until this moment, I thought was innocent and a lot of fun. Until someone said it. It’s humanistic.
What happened to looking at your own life and not the life of your sister? What happened to being a witness and not a judge? What happened to the Gospel of the Good news? The one that said I AM the truth, the way and the life? What happened to my yoke is easy and my burden is light? What happened to sacrifice made by Jesus on the cross? Do we have to sacrifice him anew everyday by slashing our sisters with our words?
I don’t see much life in the American church. I don’t see a resurrected power that will change lives. I don’t see a people with lives SO transformed that they compel people to want to know, “Who are you…why are you this way?” What I see is a religious, dogmatic theology that is so twisted and divided that there are over 42,000 sects! It’s not about HIM, as much as people proclaim it is.
After trying to figure out what to do about my “faith”. Where to go. How to act. I’ve made a decision.
I quit being an elite special person on the earth. I quit being holy and righteous, a beacon of light in the darkness. I quit being a Christian, praying like a Christian, talking like a Christian, acting like a Christian.
Yes. I believe and love and adore my Savior with my whole heart. I am learning about his amazing Father, YHWH, the God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob. I am learning to allow the spirit to move throughout my life, flowing effortlessly like the wind. I am and always will be the daughter of the most High, sister of a man named Jesus.
But I’m not a Christian. And I’m done trying to pigeon-hole myself into this mold just so I have somewhere to belong.
Because the reality…the reality is that I don’t belong. I don’t belong to this earth. I don’t belong to man. I belong to my God.
He asked me to live one life. A gift. I have spent 40 years playing around with this gift. I have rejected THIS life he gave me, for one that I may or may not get when I die. I’m tired of pining away for Heaven after death, when I have this wonderful, amazing, fantastic life RIGHT NOW. When I have this incredibly deep, endless fountain of love that flows from my Heavenly Father to me.
I’m going to quit searching for my place on this earth, and start living my life, the one given to me.
So, I apologize. I apologize if my life is viewed humanistic. If my faith is viewed as heretical. If I refuse to participate in your festivals, holidays, ceremonies and cultures. It’s not an insult. It’s just me accepting who I am, who I am called to be, and embracing the gift of life I’ve been given. I will live out loud until my last breath and my spirit returns to the Father.
May you be blessed today.